Thursday, July 17

Oh my, they'll patent ANYTHING these days

If you could patent anything, what would you patent? I don't suppose it would be this, eh?

Apparently, Joe W. Armstrong of Lenoir, TN, was concerned that previous ass-kicking devices had to be reloaded or reset after each individual spanking. When kicking your own ass, Mr. Armstrong does not believe you should be troubled with having to reset the apparatus.
"Therefore, it is an object of the present invention to provide an amusement apparatus which is user-operated and controlled, and is designed to inflict repetitive blows on the user without resetting of the apparatus and/or repositioning of the user between blows."
This ass-kicking device kicks so much ass that the user can "control the frequency and force of the blows inflicted upon the the user's buttocks." Knowing just how popular this device will be, Mr. Armstrong has thoughtfully created a device which is foldable into a self-containing package for storage or shipping.

So, um . . . yeah. I'm not quite sure what this guy was trying to achieve, let alone protect. But, at least he has patent protection until 2020.

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